Life in the Spirit, Part 14Picture of God #95, Wed 3/21/1 Born to....? We see a lot of bumper stickers these days. "Born to win" "Born to lose" "Born to shop" I think, in all honesty, that at least up until this point in my life, the most appropriate bumper sticker I could have would be "Born to worry." It seems from my earliest days, for reasons I will probably never know (assuming there are "reasons", an assumption I have learned does not always have grounds) I have been a chronic worrier. I remember standing in line in 5th grade, waiting for the bus to take us home from school. The health class that day had been about the heart and pulse and all that. I mentioned to someone that I didn't get it, I had never felt a pulse. What really is it. And this girl in my bus line took my hand, put my thumb right on my right wrist inside bone, and for the first time I felt this thing pushing and pulsing through me. Well, I got so panicked, lightheaded and faint, I went into the bathroom and threw-up. I lay on the floor of the bathroom until my Mom came & picked me up. Something about this thing pumping away inside of me that I had never noticed before, and what if it stopped, and my first childhood glimpse of mortality, and all that. --\-- Well, over the years I have constantly struggled with anxiety. (You know, it almost makes me laugh, the flaming emails I sometimes get about my alleged "holier-than-thou" attitude. When I know the real me.) Sickness, nuclear war (we used to live near an air raid siren in Tucson Arizona that would do a practice test each and every Saturday), global economic collapse, polar shifts, the whole lot. You name it, at one time or another I have worried about it. My biggest worry for the last 13 years has been losing the house. I moved in here in March of 1988, and the place is just so perfectly me I can't describe it with words. I've now lived here more than twice as long as anywhere else in my life, and this box on a hill is more "home" than I have ever known. But along with that blessing has come a lot of self-imposed hell, centered around losing the business, and with it the house. Kind of sad, really. --\-- Life in the Spirit is different. Different for me, different for you. Look, folks. The witness of the Bible is that we have been created for joy. I know it is true. Despite the evidence, God does not want us to suffer. And I have also learned this. It is very important for me, and perhaps for you:
In short, as the old saying goes, The coward dies a thousand deaths, the hero dies but one. Another one: "Take no thought for tomorrow, for each day has trouble enough of its own." - Jesus (Mt 6:34) And another: Philippians 4:4Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (St. Paul wrote that from inside a disease-infested prison cell.)You see, I have learned it really is a choice. I can choose to fret & worry, and I can also choose to rejoice. I can choose to hate, I can choose to love. But loving & rejoicing are the best tools we have to give us strength and stability, to prepare us for whatever challenges lie ahead. Or may not. Best to leave it it YHWH's hands. That is what Life in the Spirit is all about. |
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